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Anti-Valentine's Day Love Songs: 25 Of The Angriest, Saddest Pop Songs Ever Recorded (PLAYLIST)

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Whether you want to tell someone to go their own way or tell them that you can't live (if living is without them), then this playlist is for you.

From The Walker Brothers to The Magnetic Fields, ABBA to Rainbow, here's a collection of 25 heartbreakers for the heartbroken - and/or anyone who really isn't in the mood for a lovey-dovey Valentine's Day this year...



'Twilight' Star Taylor Lautner Joins BBC Comedy 'Cuckoo'

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'Twilight' star Taylor Lautner is to join the cast of BBC comedy 'Cuckoo'.

The actor - known to Twi-hards for his role as Jacob Black in the hit movie series - is joining the BBC3 show for its second series.

Lautner is to play a mysterious young stranger who shows up in Lichfield, where the show - which also stars Greg Davies and Helen Baxendale - is based.

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Taylor Lautner


The second series is set two years after the title character Cuckoo - played by Andy Samberg - disappeared while researching a book in the Himalayas, leaving his wife Rachel (Tamla Kari) to forge a new life.

Her parents Ken (Davies) and Lorna (Baxendale) and brother Dylan (Tyger Drew-Honey) are getting their lives back to normal when Lautner's character shows up.

BBC3 controller Zai Bennett: "Cuckoo was one of BBC3's most stand-out comedies, so I'm delighted to welcome it back with the addition of superstar Taylor Lautner joining the critically acclaimed Greg Davies and an outstanding British comedy cast for what will be one of the comedy treats of the year."

Executive producer Ash Atalla: "Cuckoo is one of my favourite shows I've ever been involved in. We can't wait to come back bigger and better."

My On-off Affair With Northern Soul

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Around a decade or so ago, I watched a documentary on BBC2 about this strange youth phenomena that took place in the 70s about large swathes of teens up north going to clubs in Wigan, Blackpool and Stoke every weekend for all-nighters to dance to obscure soul music. This fascinated me greatly and I asked myself, why would a bunch of white, working class teens go to such unglamorous places like the aforementioned, where no alcohol was served, that lasted literally until the sun rose and most people on the dance floor were male? Just what was this strange gathering about exactly?

Northern Soul is a music and dance movement that spawned one the biggest underground following amongst the youth that Britain has ever seen. Musically, it was about American soul music on seven-inch vinyl imported by DJ's who went there on their travels. But not by Stevie Wonder or Smokey Robinson, oh no. The whole point of Northern Soul was that it was an outlet for the disenfranchised and disillusioned with pop music like the Osmonds and heaven forbid, Sonny and Cher. Every weekend for a decade thousands of teens made their way to the Wigan Casino, Blackpool Mecca and The Golden Torch in Stoke as a form of escapism to lose themselves in the music. Northern Soul wasn't so much a scene to many, as much as it was a way of life.

These tunes were the most obscure of the obscure, plucked from indie labels in the ghettos of Detroit and Chicago. Some songs were only ever intended as demos, and here in the UK they found a new lease of life. The beat was heavy and the tunes were frenetic. And so were the dance moves. Put it this way, you had to be in tip-top physical shape to pull off them off. Lots of flips, drops and spins that would very easily damage a limb. Or two. Breakdancing has nicked heavily from Northern Soul moves and doesn't give it the credit it deserves either.

The whole scene fascinated me so much at the time that I started to dig around a little. Before long I was rummaging through Spotify, finding out that Tainted Love and What was in fact by Gloria Jones and Judy Street respectively and not Soft Cell, Be Young, Be Foolish, Be Happy and Nothing But a Heartache that were used in adverts a few years back were actually Northern Soul 'hits' (if there was such a thing).

The next step was to go to a record store and spend an hour a time at a different record store flicking through different 7"s to see anything I recognised - only Dobie Gray Drift Away and Barbara Mills Queen Of Fools stood out at the time.

Over time, it proved to be a brief phase as other genres started to pull me away and pique my interest. Until I recently saw a girl on YouTube from Bristol dance in a northern soul style to Pharrell Williams Happy and Velvet Hammer's track of the same name. I suddenly saw the error of my ways and Northern Soul pulled me back in. For the past couple of months, it's pretty much all I've been listening to. Thanks to Levanna McClean from the video that has clocked half a million viewers online, Northern Soul is in my blood again. I can't help but shuffle in the street to the songs in my earphones. I am hooked.

And I'm not alone - dedicated enthusiasts of the scene itself gather around frequently like its 1973 again and is bigger than ever. For Soul revelers young and old, there are all-nighters that take place all over the country and worldwide, there are clubs in Australia, Tokyo, Dubai to name a few.

Here's my personal top 20 in no particular order:

1. Dobie Gray: Out On The Floor
2. The Exciters: Blowing Up My Mind
3. Velvet Hammer: Happy
4. The Poppies: There's A Pain In My Heart
5. Frank Wilson: Do I Love You (Indeed I Do)
6. Jimmy Radcliffe: Love After Tonight Is All Over
7. Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons: The Night
8. Gladys Knight: No One Can Love You More
9. Barbara Mills: Queen Of Fools
10. Major Lance: You Don't Want Me No More
11. The MVP's: Turnin' My Heartbeat Up
12. Johnny Moore: Walk Like A Man
13. Luther Ingram: If It's All The Same To You Babe
14. The Precisions: If This Is Love (Then I'd Rather Be Lonely)
15. Judy Street: What
16. Willie Hutch: Love Runs Out
17. Kim Weston: Helpless
18. R. Dean Taylor: There's A Ghost In My House
19. Yvonne Baker: You Didn't Say A Word
20. Rain feat. Charity Brown: Out Of My Mind


Trust me, you have no idea how hard that list was to put together. And no doubt it is subject to change on a very regular basis. And as I keep discovering more timeless soul gems in this genre treasure trove, my ears I'm sure will be in for a special treat. For the rest of you though, hunt these tunes down - you won't regret it.

A good reference point is to hunt down The Culture Show episode from September last year about Northern Soul by Newsnight economics editor Paul Mason speaking about the scene he was a part of all those years ago. It pains me so much watching footage from all those years ago and talking heads citing that you had to be there. All very well guys, but being born in 1984 makes me feel a little worse. As for me, I'll soon be heading down to my first soul night where I'm told that people are friendly and welcome. That it's about the music first and foremost and not drunken violence or pulling a girl of the opposite sex. Just writing that sentence has me itching to go. Until then, keep the faith!

(oOh, and if you're wondering, yes I am listening to some Northern Soul at the moment - The MVP's: Turnin' My Heartbeat Up)

EXCLUSIVE: Watch The Award-Winning British Comedy Short 'Tooty's Wedding'

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A young couple's marriage hilariously hits the rocks during a weekend wedding in the award-winning British indie comedy short film 'Tooty's Wedding'. And now, thanks to producers Hoot Comedy, you can watch it for free - above.

'Tooty's Wedding' stars rising British comedy stars Mathew Baynton, Daisy Haggard, Laura Solon and Ben Willbond, and was directed by Fred Casella. The movie had a successful run at festivals all over the world - including Sundance - and Hoot Comedy's release of the video on The Huffington Post UK ties in with their move into producing a slate of full-length film and TV comedy features.

"We are overjoyed with the success achieved by all the team behind this short film, and now we’re giving it away to fans, hoping they’ll join us for the next exciting phase in our journey," says Hoot Co-Founder and Executive Producer Ben Bond. "Hoot aim to make box office hits for an international market with the best comedy talent and we have some very exciting projects on our new slate."

Where Are the Women Who Will Raise Their Voices for Those Raped, Hit, and Attacked for Being Women?

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I've had enough. I've had enough of hearing about women across Britain being attacked and abused just because they are women. I'm sick of hearing that in 2014 not only is domestic violence still a concern for many women, but that it's actually on the rise. I'm fed up with being told that one in five British women will have to go through the horrific experience of sexual violence in their lifetime, or that every year another 85,000 women in England and Wales are raped.

I've had enough of reading news stories where women are the victims of assault, or seeing photos of them beaten and bruised. I'm tired of being told about gang rape, or female genital mutilation, or sexual violence, without any emphasis on what we can do about confronting them.

Most of all, I've had enough of hearing that there is nothing we can do to change this.

Because, of those facts I've just listed, that's the one that isn't true. We can do something about it. We can rise up for justice - but not if we decide it isn't our problem.

It's easy to look at those statistics - the ones that say that more than 400,000 women are sexually assaulted in this country every year, or the ones that record a 31% rise in domestic violence since 2010 - and think that these are things that happen to someone else.

If you're looking forward to a happy Valentine's Day, it's understandably difficult to put yourself in the shoes of someone who knows only hurt and abuse.

But the reality is that violence against women affects all women - no, scratch that, all people. It affects people's mothers, sisters, girlfriends and daughters. It affects the women you pass walking down the street, or sit next to on the train, or shop in the same shops as. So why don't we talk about violence against women as something we can change? Why don't we try to do something about it?

When I started in the music industry in the early 1990s, with my band Skunk Anansie, women were shouting from the rooftops about wanting to change things, wanting to help those who weren't being heard by raising our own voices.

Put simply, they - we - were feminists; proud of the progress that had been made for women over the course of the 20th century, and looking ahead to achieving much more in the next one.

Where has that spirit gone? Where are the women - in music, politics, business, or in public life - willing to admit not only that they are feminists, but that that is a good thing? Where are the women who will raise their voices now for the women who have been battered and bruised, who have been raped, and hit, and attacked for being women?

This Friday, I'll be taking to the stage in Trafalgar Square, and shouting from the top of my lungs that we do not have to be fed up, that we do not have to accept this. At midday I'll be joining One Billion Rising, a global campaign that has made it its mission to end violence against women, and rising up for justice for women here in the UK and far further afield.

We will call for political change, from mandatory sex education in schools, action to ensure that women in immigration detention centres are safe from violence, and the repeal of visa laws that tie domestic workers to their employers and put them at serious risk of exploitation. We will dance and sing - and we will make ourselves heard. The more people who Rise with us, the louder we will be.

I've had enough. Have you?

One Billion Rising UK will be in Trafalgar Square this Friday 14 February at 12, and we'd love you to join us. For more information about the campaign see the website and follow @OBR_UK1 on Twitter. Help OBR UK spread the word on the day by joining our Thunderclap here

A Slashed Neck and a One Finger Salute That Never Happened

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There was a bit a controversy on Dancing on Ice this week - I was accused of giving the judges a one finger salute at the beginning of my performance.

It was supposedly seen as I pulled up to kickstart my skating performance as Eddie Van Halen for the classic rock song Jump, I'll admit... from one point of view it looks as if I'm doing something rather suspicious.

But it turned out after a few check backs from everyone including myself that I was innocent! Thank God. Like they say... You can get lost in the moment?! But I certainly didn't. I had so much fun.

Karen, Jason, Nicky and Ashley didn't see anything gone wrong as they seen it head on! So that was a relief.

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Twitter was going crazy! Goal mouth technology would have helped prove what had really happened before a major diplomatic incident blew up but luckily due to multiple camera angles I was shown to be innocent. The hand gesture was merely rock 'n' roll finger horns!!
The reason for the strange hand gesture was that it was '80s week on Dancing on Ice and we were celebrating pop music from 1984 (four years before I was born, so I don't exactly remember it from the time) but it was a lot of fun channeling my inner rock god, dressed in a black bandana and string vest with a killer wig might I add... Miss it already!!!

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The Van Halen song is a great one to ice dance to because it's got great energy but clearly with the title Jump, I had to do one or two jumps! One of which was a tricky split jump on cue at that moment in the song. During training this had caused a problem, I had fallen a bit sketchy and ended up on my skating partner Maria Filippov's blade and was left with a two inch long cut behind my ear. Luckily it wasn't around the front of my neck otherwise I hate to think what could have happened.

Sadly we said goodbye to Gareth Gates this week - gonna miss you Gaz! He really did pull out all the stops in the skate-off with his performance of U2's Beautiful Day, which made it a difficult decision for the judges once again - do we lose a former champ or the underdog?

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The judges would go on to choose Sam Attwater very deservedly too, as he and his future wife Vicky put their heart and soul into there performance. There were definitely a few tears in that moment. They, like me, lived to skate another week.

So this week it's boys versus girls and the remaining boys - Me, Sam Attwater and Kyran Bracken take on Suzanne Shaw, Hayley Tamaddon, and Beth Tweddle.

This is going to be a tough week, made only harder because Sam is working up North and I'm on daddy duties! So it's hard for us all to rehearse together. I guess we will all have to pull our fingers out, to be in with a chance next Sunday. We have the will power and the lads along side me have the ability. So fingers crossed we can pull it out the bag! We have to win!! Come on team boyzzzz!

Keep watching! Oh, and voting.

Thanks for reading

Lots of love, Ray.

Dancing on Ice is on ITV1 next Sunday 16th Feb at 6.15pm to 7.45pm, and Dancing on Ice: The Skate Off is at 8.30pm to 9pm

Why I'm Welcoming the BBC Ban on All-Male Panel Shows

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The other day I turned on an episode of QI. The show seemed different to normal, and it took me a few minutes to realise why: there were three women the panel. Three women and an Alan Davies. I blinked hard a few times, and checked the listings to see if it was some sort of QI: Oestrogen Special.

But hopefully soon such events won't be astonishing at all, as this week, the BBC's director of TV announced he was putting an end to panel shows with all-male line-ups. Danny Cohen told the Observer there was "no excuse" for the channel's track record of testosterone-heavy casting, a promise that comes after a long campaign of criticism over shows like Mock the Week, which featured 38 male and only five female guest comedians on its most recent series.

"You can't do that. It's not acceptable," said Cohen. To which I think the only answer is "Obviously. But why stop at one?"

Before you splutter all over the comments section, let's be clear that the end goal isn't a rigid 50/50 gender split of everything that ever goes on telly. Nobody's advocating shoehorning extra women into every possible scenario, just to make a statement.

As I see it, the ideal is to reach a point where we CAN have all-male panels again from time to time - because there would be enough all-female and fairly mixed panels to make the overall landscape a proportionate one. If you're hosting a panel on prostate cancer or male pattern baldness, by all means book a load of blokes - so long as you're not booking them exclusively to comment on rape, maternity pay and abortion rights too.

Yes, it might mean token casting (though frankly, anyone who thinks we don't have sufficient female comedy talent to fill the quota needs to get out/on YouTube more). Being the token anything is never anyone's ideal. But if a few years of tokenism can level the playing field to a point where it's no longer needed at all, sign me up.

The main issue we want to be fretting over isn't whether Cohen's rule will turn telly into a ladyfest full of token ladies padding out panels with lady-skewed opinions, but whether the minimum will also, through lazy resistance, become a maximum too.

Because one woman among three men is not, however you dress it up in novelty, very many women. It's half the amount needed to actually represent the population, and even fewer than the number needed to make up for years and years of all-male broadcasting at which nobody batted an eye. It's a ratio that will get you turned away from many West End nightclubs - yet one is better than none, and so it's on this crumb of progress we must feast for the time being.

And what's the alternative? We could sit back and wait another few decades for the balance to magically correct itself, all on its own. Maybe it will. But can we really expect a generation rich in fantastic female comedians and commentators to rise up and take the reins without a few more examples on TV to first let them know that it's possible?

Let's fill the quota, overfill it, and top it up some more. Then when there are enough female voices on our screens, we can ditch the argument altogether - and won't that be a relief?

Can 'Salamander' Fill The Big Gap Left By 'The Bridge' On Saturday Nights?

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Yes, yes, I know… 'The Bridge' has finished and it doesn't feel like Saturday nights on BBC4 can ever be the same again… or until Series 3 some time next year, anyway.

But hearts can be mended and, to ease our woes, from across the continent we've been sent 'Salamander' - a, get this, Flemish political thriller.

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Filip Peeters plays Detective Inspector Paul Gerardi - dogged maverick, naturally


I think it's fair to say there's really only one Belgian that springs to mind when it comes to crime, and the solving thereof. Nonetheless, Brussels felt like a natural home for this conspiracy tale debut, and it was a lot brighter, by which I mean greyer, than many episodes of 'The Killing' and 'The Bridge'. I feel almost disloyal to Saga and Martin saying this, but I really enjoyed 'Salamander'. And I wasn't the only one, with more than a million viewers tuning in.

The series started with an audacious raid on a private bank. With the whole bank's booty at their disposal, in fact only 66 'sensitive' safes were ransacked by a band of elite robbers, led by Joachim Klaus (actor Koen De Bouw), who manages to remain charismatic even with a Davey lamp plonked on his head. And they didn't take everything, either.

Enter Detective Inspector Paul Girardi, rubbing his white-haired chin after receiving a tip-off from one of his informers. He's a - you guessed it - maverick cop, who'd rather spend his day off cuddling his lipsticked wife and not doing the shopping than solving a crime nobody wants solved.

salamander
An Miller plays Paul's troubled, but always lipsticked wife


But - and you guessed again - he doesn't take kindly to watching men inexplicably being bumped off while he's looking at them out of the window, or on the phone to them from his own uncleaned kitchen. That's because he just happens to be one of CID's premier detectives, a man who "when he meets resistance, digs his heels further in" according to his anxious boss. Naturally.

Yes, for the attentive crime drama viewer in our midst, there are easily some cliches and flaws to admit to in this fare, that has more than a couple of strands of Da Vinci Code DNA.

For a start, I haven't spotted an interesting female yet, certainly nobody to topple Saga Noren from her foreign crime throne, or get Sarah Lund in a knit.

salamander
The leader of the robbers is the charismatic Joachim Klaus, played by Koen De Bouw


The car is another problem (call me picky). The 'chase' - both of them, for goodness sake! - wouldn't have troubled Starsky and Hutch or even a speed camera, there's no way someone as experienced as Giradi would have parked right outside the bank when he knew he was being watched, and that beaten-up old Golf isn't a touch on Saga's vintage Porsche.

But there are the smaller things to enjoy - the big bald head of the resolutely unsmiling bank manager Raymond Jonkhere, bringing back flashes of 'Murder One' veteran lawman Ted Hoffman (Daniel Benzali), the flashes of Brussels architecture including the forbidding Palais de Justice, coincidentally the biggest building constructed in the 19th century.

And in the middle of it all, Paul Gerardi himself. Critics have spent an enjoyable couple of days deciding who he looks like. Alison Graham called him "a renegade from a 1960s Charlton Heston biblical epic". The Telegraph's Ben Lawrence decided he was "a cross between Richard Branson and Ernest Hemingway". The Indie's Ellen E Jones opted for "the love-child of Jeremy Clarkson and Father Christmas". This man is obviously eye-catching.

For my tuppence worth, he looks like an Aussie farmer forced to put on a clean white shirt, polish his boots (RM Williams, of course) and drag himself out for an evening dance. All languid walk and horizon-scanning gaze. But there's a twinkle in his eye and he likes his wife.

Any which way, in the much-remarked on absence of Saga and Martin, there are plenty more unpleasant companions to be stuck with on Saturday nights while it rains outside, and the Porsche is sitting somewhere having its engine cleaned.

Catch 'Salamander' Episodes 1 and 2 on BBCiPlayer. It continues on Saturday night on BBC4 at 9pm.

'The Monuments Men' Premiere Live Stream: Watch George Clooney On The Red Carpet (VIDEO)

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Tune in above to watch George Clooney walk the red carpet at the UK premiere of his latest flick, 'The Monuments Men', on Tuesday.

George directs the film and also heads up the cast that includes Matt Damon, Cate Blanchett, Bill Murray, John Goodman, Jean Dujardin and Hugh Bonneville.

More on the film below:

Based on the true story of the greatest treasure hunt in history, The Monuments Men focuses on an unlikely World War II platoon, tasked by FDR with going into Germany to rescue artistic masterpieces from Nazi thieves and returning them to their rightful owners. It would be an impossible mission: with the art trapped behind enemy lines, and with the German army under orders to destroy everything as the Reich fell, how could these guys – seven museum directors, curators, and art historians, all more familiar with Michelangelo than the M-1 – possibly hope to succeed? But as the Monuments Men, as they were called, found themselves in a race against time to avoid the destruction of 1000 years of culture, they would risk their lives to protect and defend mankind’s greatest achievements.


Can 'Line of Duty' Series 2 Succeed Without Lennie James As Corrupt Tony Gates?

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'Line of Duty' was BBC2's most successful ever drama, when it came out last year, thanks in no small part to the enigmatic charisma of actor Lennie James in the central role of corrupt cop Tony Gates.

Millions watched agog as he tried desperately to wrangle his way out of an investigation into his dealings and finances by Internal Affairs, also juggling wife and mistress, played by an equally ill-fated Gina McKee.

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Lennie James played ill-fated corrupt cop Tony Gates in the first series, one of BBC's biggest ever hits


But those same millions will know that Gates met an abrupt end in the closing episode of the last series, posing the question of whether the series will have the same fire in its belly without his unique appeal?

The short answer is yes.

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Adrian Dunbar, Martin Compston, Vicky McClure are all back on duty in Line of Duty series 2


The first 10 minutes of the new series sets the scene, with Keeley Hawes as Detective Inspector Lindsay Denton taking part in the safe transportation of a protected witness - a police exercise which goes tragically wrong, and results in her being ostracised by her colleagues, and investigated by the Internal Affairs wing of the police - enter Martin Compston and Vicky McClure in the same roles as in the first series, those cops charged with policing the police, not popular but necessary, and suddenly it is clear - they are the glue of this series.

Meanwhile, there is no doubt about it. Keeley Hawes makes a strong, and surprising, replacement for Lennie James, with none of her usual glamour. Instead, she is down-at-heel, defiantly unglamorous, as a defeated woman, with money worries, sick relatives and only her job to define her. Or is there more to her story?

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Keeley Hawes is almost unrecognisable as Lindsay Denton, under investigation by her own force


Keeley says herself of stepping into Lennie James's space, "I think the genius of it is to cast a 37-year-old white woman, it couldn't be any more different. People can compare if they want to, but I don't feel any pressure.

"You've got the others who are familiar if you're a fan, while you're just passing through. The whole concept is that there will always be a new strand. And that keeps it really fresh."

Martin Compston adds, "You’re going to miss him. He’s a force of nature, a lovely guy and phenomenal actor. Everybody ups their game to match him.

"The story delves a bit more into our personal lives, we show more of the problems, it’s more well-rounded. There was a lot of pressure on us, because the first series was so strong, but I hope we’ve done it.”


'Line of Duty' Series 2 starts tonight on BBC2, at 9pm. Pictures below...

Madonna Wears Head-To-Toe Leather At American Songbook Event In New York (PICS)

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Madonna looked more Evil Queen than Queen of Pop after rocking up to an event in New York in this *checks notes* ensemble.

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Madonna


Madge was dressed head-to-toe in black leather and carrying a broom cane as she arrived at the Lincoln Centre in the Big A to honour Bryan Lourd (me neither).

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Daniel Craig was also at the event


Also at the bash was James Bond star Daniel Craig and Anne Hathaway, who looked as amused by her Madgesty's bizarre outfit as the rest of us.

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Mind you, no one looked as stunned as the unidentified guest dressed in white to the left of the singer. But that might have had less to do with Madonna's frock and more the fact that just moments earlier Madge had licked her face.

Brrrrr.

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The Daily Show: The US Media's Coverage Of Francois Hollande's Visit (VIDEO)

Luisa Zissman Strips To Her Underwear For Zoo Magazine, Wants A 'Boob-Off' With Helen Flanagan (NSFW PICS)

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Luisa Zissman has thrown down the gauntlet to her boob-flashing rival Helen Flanagan by offering to have a 'boob-off' with the former 'Coronation Street' star.

Luisa offered up the challenge in an interview with this week's Zoo magazine, which also features a series of saucy snaps of the 'Apprentice' runner-up in her smalls.

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Luisa Zissman


Standard.

She told the lads' mag: “Apparently Helen Flanagan had the nerve to say that I’m not classy.

"She’s got some f**king front, that girl. Every time I see a picture of her, her tits are out.

"Don’t get me wrong – I’ve got no problem with that – but 
mine are better than hers anyway. They’re the best five grand I ever spent! Maybe we should have a boob-off.”

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And the star also revealed she had a bit of a soft spot for her 'Celebrity Big Brother' housemate, Dappy after errrrm, getting an eyeful of what he kept in his trousers.

“I did fancy Dappy a little bit," she admitted. "He’s cute. I can also confirm his p*nis is comparable to a magnum of Dom Perignon!

"We didn’t get it on, but I did once accidentally see it in the toilet mirror. And yes, it is the biggest I’ve seen! He’s weirdly shy about it, actually.”

And Dappy, as we know, wasn't the only 'CBB' housemate who caught her eye, but we had no idea just how far she went with Jasmine Waltz in the house - until now.

“I was the most sexually naughty, she said. "I don’t think they showed a lot of what I did with Jasmine. I don’t think they could.

"We made a bed away from the cameras and the microphones and we did some… stuff. We’ve seen each other naked, put it that way.

"She is seriously hot – stupidly good looking – and I’ve kissed her quite a few times. Obviously I’d have a threesome with her, but you can’t beat a man at the end of the day, can you?”

She added: “Because I’m the way I am, I think I allowed other people to be raunchy. After two days in there, I was going stir crazy.

"The boys kept going into the shower to crack one out. I actually walked in on one of them. Everyone was at it! I did have a go at it in the shower myself, but I can’t climax standing up.

"Being in the house for three and a half weeks was very sexually frustrating, believe me. But I’m alright now – I’ve been sorted out since then!”

Read the full interview in this week's Zoo magazine, out now. www.zootoday.co.uk

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Helen Flanagan Shows Off Her New Red Hair In Instagram 'Ginger' Selfie (PIC)

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It's the moment we've been waiting for people - Helen Flanagan has posed for her very first Instagram selfie WITH RED HAIR.

I know, it really is quite the momentous occasion.

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Red Alert! Helen Flanagan has gone ginger


The former 'Coronation Street' star has ditched her trademark blonde tresses (and her nose by the looks of it) for 'ginger' locks (her words, don't shoot the ginger messenger).

"My first ginger selfie :)" she captioned the snap (seeee?)

Yesterday we revealed how fellow Z-lister Luisa Zissman wants a 'boob-off' with Hels after the actress had the nerve to say she wasn't 'classy'.

"Apparently Helen Flanagan had the nerve to say that I’m not classy," Luisa told Zoo magazine. "She’s got some f**king front, that girl. Every time I see a picture of her, her t*ts are out.

"Don’t get me wrong – I’ve got no problem with that – but mine are better than hers anyway.

"They’re the best five grand I ever spent! Maybe we should have a boob-off.”



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The Perfect Love Song Revealed... Scientifically, With A Little Help From Spotify

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What song gives you the tingles? Sends you into a romantic daydream even when you're hoovering?

Those clever folk at Spotify have come up with the perfect love song list, thanks to the science of an even more clever character - Professor of Cognitive Psychology and Neuroscience, Jacob Jolji.

Jolij has analysed a vast array of love songs to reveal what constitutes the perfect love song, based on his formula which considers tempo, rhythm and chord progression.

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When a man you don't know buys you flowers, that's chord progression


The research reveals that penning a perfect love song comes down this tried and tested formula: Sentimental lyrics + slow tempo + syncopated rhythm + major key + standard chord progression = perfect love song. The feeling of familiarity is also something which will keep us wanting to listen to the song again and again.

Professor Jolij says of Adele's cover of Bob Dylan's 'Make You Feel My Love': "You clearly hear the syncopated rhythm in the melody - it's (approximately) ONE - and - two - and - THREE - and - four - AND - ONE - and - two - and - THREE - and - four - AND - ONE - and etc. You see that there are two accents close together, repeating every bar. This creates the feel of a relaxed heartbeat, a sound we are very familiar with, as that is what we heard during our period in the womb. Some researchers believe this is the reason why these rhythms have a soothing and relaxing quality.’’

So now you know. Those tingles? Not passion at all, just science. With a bit of syncopation. Who said romance was dead, eh?

Here are the results of Professor Jolij's findings below... is he right, or have you got a favourite that defies all such physics? Let us know...

Former 'X Factor' Judge Tulisa Denies Music Festival Assault Charge

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Former 'X Factor' judge Tulisa has denied an assault charge linked to claims she punched a blogger at a music festival.

The 25-year-old appeared at Chelmsford Magistrates' Court in Essex today where she was facing one count of common assault.

Her assistant Gareth Varey is accused of threatening behaviour, which he also denies.

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Tulisa


The charges are linked to an alleged confrontation with a blogger at the V Festival last year.

The singer's spokesman Simon Jones said: "Tulisa has been charged with an offence of common assault, and her PA Gareth Varey with an offence of threatening behaviour.

"Today at court Tulisa and Gareth entered pleas of not guilty to these unfounded allegations and they both look forward to demonstrating their innocence at the forthcoming trial."

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Blushing Bride Miss Piggy Unveils Vivienne Westwood Wedding Dress For Muppets Movie (PICTURE)

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Blushing bride Miss Piggy has unveiled her Vivienne Westwood white gown for her big day in the upcoming Muppets film.

Disney film 'Muppets Most Wanted', starring Tina Fey and Ricky Gervais, features the characters on a mayhem-hit grand tour of Europe.

Miss Piggy, who dons the ivory couture wedding gown in the movie, has been trying to convince Kermit the Frog to marry her for years but film bosses have kept schtum on whether fans will see them finally manage to tie the knot.

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"Vivienne Westwood is fabulous-just like moi," said Miss Piggy.

"When I asked her to design this wedding dress for moi's new movie..., she was thrilled and I was thrilled. The only one a bit 'iffy' about it was the frog."

The gown, teamed up with an ivory tulle veil, has "corset detailing and paillettes made from recycled plastic bottles".

British designer Westwood spoke about the gown in the March issue of US Harper's Bazaar.

She said: "The dress is one of my favourite styles. It's called the Court dress and is inspired by 17th Century English royalty and the court of King Charles II.

"It has been designed especially ...in a white pearl sequin fabric made from recycled water bottles. It's the perfect choice for a royal sow."

'Muppets Most Wanted', directed by James Bobin, hits UK cinemas on March 28.

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20 Celebrity Names You're Pronouncing Wrongly

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Well, we say you're pronouncing them wrongly. But really, we mean we are. And when we say 'we', we mean 'we British people'.

Yes, with Shia LaBeouf making headlines again (see above), we thought it only right that while we're having a good old laugh at him, we should at least be pronouncing his name correctly.

And this led us down the rabbit warren below - 20 celebrities whose names we've never been completely sure of and/or have always mispronounced. Read (out loud) and learn, people!

Life in the Arts Lane - Week 62 - Three Lunches and Water Everywere

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When travelling, the world can seem very small. A plane journey can throw one into the middle of anywhere in just a short while. London seems like the springboard from which anywhere can be reached. This week, the world appears very fragmented, though only locally. Rain keeps coming down in biblical proportions. This rain has been falling without respite for weeks and weeks. The streets are wet in every city, nation-wide rivers are bulging and bursting their banks, long forgotten deep wells have bubbled up and erupted with water. Any place where water is normally calm and passive, it is currently torrid and intense. Last week, in another stormy flare-up, the train station at Dawlish in South Devon was swept away and suddenly Cornwall was cut off from the rest of the country. In Somerset itself, beaches are littered with debris and the wind blows huge waves crashing against sea walls. All this effulgent natural brouhaha conjures up a myriad curious comparisons from history, novels and countries with more theatrical weather. On a train, despite delays and diversions and a rather charming slackening of ticket discipline, London is reached with a huge sigh of relief, as if a safe haven has been secured. Exhausted and overdue passengers drift out of the station heading for private and public transport feeling like they have survived; been through something. London may be wet, but it is quiet and safe and everything still works, with the minor extra frustration of a tube workers' strike.

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In London work carries on as semi-normal. Certainly the profound and crucial ritual of lunch continues unabated. Sumosan in Albemarle St is a Japanese restaurant that serves a delicious and reasonably-priced set lunch. Japanese food is very scary, you can easily spend several hundred pounds on a fancy selection of rarefied sliced raw fish or equally often have a bargain meal in the same place. Sumosan manifests this exact dichotomy. Stick to the set menu and you can survive, go off-piste, or more correctly, a la carte, and you will require a second mortgage. I dined with Jorge and Andreas from Coll & Cortes, actual neighbours of the restaurant. Andreas used to be at Christie's and the thrill of being out of captivity and into the wild of dealing has given him a huge burst of energy. Sitting next to him is like sitting next to an unexploded bomb, he is so keen and enthusiastic. Jorge, who is a dapper European, has bright eyes and the ubiquitous semi-beard. He is the scion of a family of dealers, his father was and is one of the great dealers in decorative arts with a sixth sense for finding rare and unusual japanned pieces, made for his home country, Spain, and exported from England in the 18th century. Going through Vicente's files is like taking a tour through some of the great pieces that have been on the market in the last 30 years. Jorge has the drive and energy but has turned his attention to old master paintings, sculpture and works of art. He is based in London and he is pushing his business forward with unbelievable force. Lunch with these two left me inspired but exhausted. I ran back to the office to attend a PR meeting replete but fatigued. However, an hour or so later, having reviewed some of the excitements and novelty we have put in place for Masterpiece this year, my energies were topped right back up.

The next day, Nazy and I had the treat and privilege of visiting and having lunch at the Royal Hospital in the Great Hall. This magnificent panelled room is lined with oak tables and we sat at one near the end. Portraits look down and bedraggled flags hang from poles above; trophies of war and lists of the fallen compete for attention. On the table by the entrance, two enormous, black, boiled leather beer jugs or 'Jacks' sit importantly in solitary splendour. The food is not bad but it is more meaningful than that. It is comfortable food; food that neither challenges nor disgusts. Steamed pudding and warm custard enhance the end of the menu and everyone knows that they are going to be fine. We talk plans for this year and we conjecture about the future. The Hospital is in good shape itself with an ambitious plan underway for improvements and redevelopment throughout the grounds. Currently the paths and roads are all being upgraded along with the services hidden beneath the surface. We take a walk around Ranelagh Gardens, which is a wonderful hidden voluptuous pocket landscape beside the sober flat grounds that support our tent in June. In a few years' time, the place will be totally spick and span. The military officers that run the Hospital have given the place an air of concerted effort, like a military campaign in miniature and in peacetime. The in-pensioners are very well cared for both now and even more so in the future. In bold letters in Latin, the figure court proudly displays the royal founders of the hospital and their purpose for the care of those who have served this country in the armed forces. It is clearly a noble and rewarding work.

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Image credit (http://www.flickr.com/photos/tehbus/sets/72157632135042981/with/8231817471/)


There is a dealer in Pimlico who used to work with me at Mallett called Tarquin Bilgen but it amuses me to dub him Tarquinius Maximus. He is tall and gangly and has an intense manner. He has created in his small corridor of a shop a selling machine of some potency. He has sold a few things to me and for me. I don't think I quite qualify as a good client but we get on well enough. He has the most charming manners and makes one feel both special and intelligent. I have made the habit of visiting twice a year for lunch. It is like going to a mental health spa. He does not drink so it is quite a reasonably priced treatment session. During each course he will admire and compliment ones innovation, pioneering spirit, previous and possible future achievements. This Friday was no exception. I had sold something that I had promised to him so I felt I owed him a special treat and I predicted I would get an especially large boost for my fragile confidence. I booked the Chinese restaurant Hunan in Pimlico Road. Discrete though the outside is, the interior is more so. You would never imagine that such a humble presentation should offer up such a feast. You do not see a menu, you simply point out any allergies you might have. After a brief pause, dishes begin to appear and two and a half hours later you are poured out onto the street to stagger off in search of exercise. Each dish is small and delicate. The balance between sweet and savoury and between meat and fish is totally harmonious and the only problem is the relentless progress of the dishes. I did get my emotional boost but Tarquinius was seriously distracted from his duty by the food, a lesson for next time.

'Fleming' Star Dominic Cooper Talks James Bond, 'Mamma Mia' And Keeping It Real On A Thursday Night

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Let's just get the burning question out of the way first.

"Dominic Cooper, is your portrayal of Ian Fleming in this new big-budget biopic (starting on Sky Atlantic, tonight) your official audition to be considered for the role of James Bond, should it come your way?"

Mr Cooper's eyebrow shoots up in a way, worthy of 007 himself, and takes another sip of his distinctly stirred tea.

"It’s a funny one, it’s such a big question," he begins. "No one has ever said no to that job, you have to say yes to it, and show excitement towards it, which I think everyone would have.

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Dominic Cooper takes on Ian Fleming in all his complexity in the new Sky Atlantic biopic


"The reality of it is something very different and comes with all sorts of stuff. It’s full of baggage and it changes everything, and it would be really interesting, I’ve worked with a couple of previous Bonds, and I never got any juicy information about how they really felt – they just seemed really grateful for the experience of it.

"The obvious answer is yes, absolutely, I’d love to be… it would be really interesting. Daniel Craig has given some really interesting interviews about how he can’t do a small film ever again. But you, no matter what, when you’re approached for that decision, you must try to factor in every outcome. Will I be this person for evermore? But then you remember as a kid, seeing those films. And that person actually gets paid. That’s their job…" Voice fades away. More tea.

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Ian and Anne Fleming's relationship was far from peaceful, as shown in some brutal scenes


In the meantime, Ian Fleming, as we see him brought to life full-throttle by Dominic, isn't exactly desk-bound. Instead, he's posturing around London, blagging his way into Naval Intelligence, fuelled only by a louche swagger and a ridiculous imagination. When he's not somewhere behind enemy lines, or pretending to be, he's engaged in a parry-and-thrust 'romantic' duel with the lady who would become his wife, Anne (played by Lara Pulver) that is less passionate than brutal, and sometimes verges on the sadistic.

Dominic doesn't attempt to excuse him, but he obviously enjoys Fleming in all his complexity...

"It wouldn’t be fun to play someone who’s capable of those things he’s seemingly capable of, but not find a side to him that you kind of enjoyed being a voyeur of," he muses. "By all accounts, he wasn’t particularly pleasant. Bond was terrible in the books, and that was his ideal man."

What about Fleming's overbearing mother, and overachieving brother - was that a route to finding some sympathy for his openly obnoxious behaviour as played out on screen? Apparently not...

"I found it very hard to feel sympathy for a man who had everything going for him in the world," Dominic adds. "I didn’t feel sorry for him."

He continues:

"I think I’m an odd choice for this role. I’m very far removed from the world in which he existed, and I know a lot of actors of more similar upbringing, in that world, the schooling."

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Dominic Cooper feels he's an "odd choice" for the role, but it fits him like a glove


One aspect of Dominic Cooper's career that tickles him, and makes him so easy to interview, is both the access he has gained to this more high-falutin' world as a result of his success, and his head-scratching attitude to it all.

"You find yourself at ambassadors’ houses in different countries, and you think, 'If they could see me scratching around the streets of Lewisham on a Saturday night.' Acting does open up doors, and it’s great to see first hand those people in their environment, but you find yourself pinching yourself."

Filming 'Mamma Mia' in the Greek Islands alongside Meryl Streep and Pierce Brosnan was another one of those moments, it seems.

"You're put on a speedboat between different Greek islands to do press, and thinking, 'People actually live like this.' I’ve never seen it be healthy, growing up with too much. It's something you can be envious of, but it’s actually a hindrance, it prohibits that desire to invest or dare, or need. It’s always full of more complications than the other way round."

So what is real for Dominic Cooper, popular and increasingly critically admired, ever since he struck gold on screen with his charismatic turn as one of Alan Bennett's History Boys?

"Playing football on a Thursday night… in a cage in Deptford," he adds for good measure.

"For some bizarre reason I’m up front, which means I do hardly anything."

But that means your name goes on the sheet if you score?

"Yes, but that means nothing," he bursts out indignantly. "Who looks at those sheets? What matters is being involved in the game."

'Fleming' starts tonight on Sky Atlantic, at 10pm. Watch the trailer below...
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