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Lauren Goodger And Jake McLean's Foxy Bingo Body Paint Photo-Shoot Just Might Be Her Most Ridiculous Ever (PICS)

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Lauren Goodger may well have just out-Goodged herself with her latest ridicu-mazing photo-shoot.

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The former ‘The Only Way Is Essex’ cast member, and her freshly-reconciled boyfriend, Jake McLean, have teamed up to promote Foxy Bingo’s latest product, an adult chocolate body paint called ‘Fur Afters’.

Because truly, when trying to set the mood for a bit of romance, who doesn’t want the image of a giant anthropomorphic fox instilled in their brains, eh?

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Absolutely astounding


The steamy photo-shoot sees The Goodge covering a shirtless Jake in the chocolate paint… although, unfortunately for them, there’s a third wheel.

Yes, trying to get in on the fun, the bingo company’s eponymous mascot, Foxy, can’t help but try and steal a slice of the action, much to the couple’s apparent bemusement.

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Three's a crowd, Foxy


Absolutely stunning, we’re sure you agree.

Speaking about what provoked her to lop her boyfriend’s top off and cover in him in chocolate paint, all in the name of online bingo, Lauren said: “I’ve known Foxy for years, he’s one of my best mates, so I of course said yes. Fur Afters is really tasty too, I love it!”

Just… yeah. We have no words. So here’s another photo of the ridiculousness all playing out.

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Seriously though, why is a bingo company now bringing out a range of body paint? So many questions


Lauren and Jake announced earlier this year that they were back together, and the reality star has already proved her commitment to the relationship, by unveiling a tattoo of Jake’s name.

She later described him as her “soulmate”, in a gushing Instagram post.



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Stephen Lewis Dead: 'On The Buses' Actor, Who Played Blakey In The Comedy Series, Dies, Aged 88

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Comedy actor Stephen Lewis, best known for his role as Blakey in ‘On The Buses’, has died, at the age of 88.

Stephen played bus inspector Cyril Blake in the ITV comedy for four years, later reprising the role in three big screen adaptations and the spin-off series, ‘Don’t Drink The Water’.

He died in his sleep on Wednesday night, at the East London nursing home where he had been living for the past three years.

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Stephen Lewis


The actor’s niece, Rebecca Lewis, has spoken fondly of her uncle, claiming he was “in high spirits” right until the end of her life.

stephen lewis on the buses
Stephen in 'On The Buses'


Speaking about his legacy in the world of comedy, she said: “We just want people to remember him.”




Rashid Ebrahimkhan, who manages the nursing home where he dies, noted that he would never shy away from reciting his memorable ‘On The Buses’ catchphrases, ‘I'll get you for this Butler’ and ‘Get those buses out, Butler’, adding: “He still had his sense of humour, very much so, like he was on On The Buses. He had the sense of humour until the last.”

Stephen’s other credits include, ‘Sparrers Can’t Sing’, a play he wrote in the 1960s, which was later adapted into a film, starring Barbara Windsor.

He also later appeared as Clem Hemingway in the BBC sitcom, ‘Last Of The Summer Wine’.



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'The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air' To Return For New Series, With Will Smith As Executive Producer?

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Now this is a (news) story all about how…

OK, we won’t try and do the rap, but there is some great news for anyone who spent any time watching telly in the 1990s - a reboot of ‘The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air’ is reportedly in the works.

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Will Smith as the 'Fresh Prince'


There’s some good news and bad news about the reported new series, though.

The good news is that, according to TV Line, Will Smith’s production company, Overbrook Entertainment, is said to be working on the new series, which we reckon could be out in time for the show’s 20th anniversary next year.

Sadly, the bad news is… Will isn’t actually thought to be starring in it himself, instead acting “solely as a producer”.

It’s not known if the new show would act as a stand-alone from the original 90s series (in which case we’re calling Jaden Smith for the leading role now), or a continuation of the story we all know and love.

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The original 'Fresh Prince' cast


‘The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air’ ran for six series, until its finale in 1996, and helped launch Will Smith to become a household name.

Although billed as a comedy, ‘The Fresh Prince’ dealt with some serious topics over the years, including gun crime, race issues and family relationships.

On a lighter note, it was also responsible for this wonderful gif…

via GIPHY



Amazing.

The cast also included Alfonso Ribeiro as Will’s cousin, Carlton, and James Avery as Uncle Phil.

During its six time on the air, it featured guest appearances from stars including Tyra Banks, William Shatner, Chris Rock, Hugh Hefner and Naomi Campbell.

Let's celebrate the exciting news with a quick blast from the past, eh..?





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‘Celebrity Big Brother' 2015: US Actor Daniel Baldwin Rumoured To Be Signing Up

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Daniel Baldwin is the latest big name rumoured to be heading into the ‘Celebrity Big Brother’ house later this month.

The actor, will be following in his brother’s footsteps, following Stephen Baldwin’s stint in the house back in 2010.

daniel baldwin
Daniel has starred on a number of US reality TV shows


The Mirror reports that the ‘NBC Homicide: Life on the Street’ actor is currently preparing to star on the show, which will have a ‘UK vs. USA’ theme.

Other stars rumoured to be heading into the Borehamwood bungalow include Tila Tequila, and ‘X Factor’ couple Chloe Jasmine and Stevi Ritchie.

One celebrity who won’t be on the show is Danniella Westbrook. Despite rumours that she was set to land a huge paycheck for signing up, it’s now been reported that producers have decided the former ‘EastEnders’ star should not move into the house.

“The producers were desperate to get Danniella on the show because, let’s face it, she’d make great TV,” a source stated on Thursday. “She was invited to meet them and alarm bells started ringing straight away. She was incredibly incoherent.”

See all the celebs rumoured to be heading into the house below…



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Kerry Katona's Husband George Kay 'Arrested On Suspicion Of Car-Jacking And Jewel Theft'

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Kerry Katona’s husband, George Kay, has been arrested on suspicion of conspiracy to commit robbery, according to reports.

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The Atomic Kitten singer was said to have been unaware of her husband’s arrest, which reportedly came after tens of thousands of pounds worth of jewels were allegedly stolen in a car-jacking incident.

As reported by The Sun, George has been bailed until later in the month.

george kay kerry katona
George Kay and Kerry Katona


According to the newspaper, three men assaulted a driver, before making off with two bags, full of jewellery.

It's alleged that they then assaulted a man, after pulling him out of his Honda car and driving off in it, with the car later turning up in North London.

A source told The Sun on Friday: “Kerry doesn’t know that George has been arrested. When she finds out she will be heartbroken.

“It is the last thing she needs after the year they have had.”


Herts Police have confirmed that a 35-year-old man from Oxfordshire had been arrested, and three men, all from London, had also been held.

Last month, it was claimed that George had walked out on Kerry, after a string of furious rows, but they recently relocated to Sussex, with the move said to be acting as a fresh start for the couple.

However, they received a less than warm reception from their new neighbours, with Kerry’s daughter Lilly sharing an open letter on her Twitter page, urging them not to be too critical of her mum.



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Bradley Cooper Stars As A Chef With A Past In First 'Burnt' Trailer

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Never has cookery on screen been so popular, and now even Bradley Cooper's caught the GBBO bug, it seems.

However, The four-time Oscar nominee makes the 'Great British Bake Off' contestants look pretty laidback, in this first trailer for 'Burnt', where he plays a chef with a past.

Bradley, fresh from Oscar-nominated success in 'American Sniper', plays Adam Jones, a Michelin-starred chef riding high at the top of the Paris restaurant scene, until his destructive lifestyle catches up with him and he loses everything.

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Bradley Cooper stars as washed-up chef Adam Jones in this high-speed culinary drama


With a lot of people thinking he's dead, Adam is actually on his way to London, where he brings his talents and uncompromising vision to bear on the capital's brand new restaurant.

Alongside Bradley are co-stars Sienna Miller, Emma Thompson, Alicia Vikander and Oscar nominee Daniel Bruhl. The script is penned by Oscar nominee Steven Knight, following his success with 'Peaky Blinders', and the film's directed by Emmy Award-winning John Wells ('August: Osage County').

The film will be in UK cinemas from 16 October.



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Henry Cavill Reveals How He Got Revenge After Childhood Bullies' Weight Jibes

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Henry Cavill has revealed how he got back at the bullies who teased him during his teenage years.

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While he may now be known internationally as one of the most fancied men in the world, the star of ‘The Man From U.N.C.L.E.’ has revealed that he wasn’t always so popular.

Opening up to The Sun, he says: “Because I was overweight and I had ambitions, I was target number one for the alphas of each group.”

henry cavill
Henry Cavill


However, years later he managed to get the last laugh over the bullies, admitting that now that he’s famous, his tormentors have done a complete 180.

He admits: “I’ve had a couple of awkward moments where I’ve seen one in a room and deliberately ignored him and really enjoyed it.

“He kept looking over and trying to make eye contact and I just kept on blanking him. That was enjoyable because he looks like he’s still a w*****.”


Henry has previously said he thinks that having been bullied at school has helped him become a better actor, telling People magazine: “Someone who is on the outskirts of popularity is someone who gets to look in, so I became very much an observer, and that taught me an awful lot about people.

“It helped me read people very well, which has helped me in this industry. If I can understand the inner workings of a human being, then I can probably be a better actor."


Earlier this week, Henry admitted to a rather embarrassing on-set incident, when he brought new meaning to the term “wooden acting”, during a sex scene.



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Katie Hopkins Blasts David Beckham For His Response To Harper Dummy Critics

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Katie Hopkins has blasted David Beckham over his reaction to the criticism he received after his four-year-old daughter Harper was pictured with a dummy in her mouth.

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Earlier this week, Becks took to Instagram to hit out at the Daily Mail for questioning whether Harper should still be using a dummy.

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Katie Hopkins isn't impressed with David Beckham


But Katie thinks David should take the criticism on his chiseled chin, arguing that it all goes with the territory of being in the public eye.

"Becks, you inked bundle of loveliness, you make your living out of the world watching you. You can’t dictate a soft filter for the lens as well," she wrote in her column for The Sun.

"As I often lecture businesses, it is not the email you send which matters, but how people feel when they read it. Therein lies the truth of your words.”

The former ‘Apprentice’ star then questioned why the former footballer was allowing the opinions of others to bother him in the first place.

"To that end, it is not the dummy in your daughter’s face which matters, or the opinions of the sofa-sitting masses. You have to question why you are letting their opinions upset you and own your problem," she wrote.

In a rare public outburst on Tuesday, David addressed his critics, telling them to ‘think twice’ before making comments about his parenting skills.






“Why do people feel they have the right to criticize a parent about their own children without having any facts??” he wrote.

“Everybody who has children knows that when they aren't feeling well or have a fever you do what comforts them best and most of the time it's a pacifier so those who criticize think twice about what you say about other people's children because actually you have no right to criticize me as a parent…(sic).”



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Caroline Flack 'Splits From Jack Street For Second Time', Vents Her Feelings In Twitter Rant

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Caroline Flack has reportedly split from her boyfriend, Jack Street, for the second time.

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Last year, Caroline called off her relationship with Jack, who is the manager of Sam Smith, after 18 months of dating, shortly before she was crowned ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ champion.

The two were later thought to have reconciled, although given the tweets she posted about him on Thursday night, it sounds as though they have broken up once again.

caroline flack jack street
Caroline Flack


The Sun have reported that Caroline tweeted - and later deleted - an angry message aimed at Jack, writing: “@jackb_street dear you. Tiny little man. You’ll never change for anyone. But good luck with that.”

She then added: “Honestly he is evil.”

Back in December, Caroline claimed that appearing on ‘Strictly’ had helped her through her split the first time around, saying: “You don’t feel bad when you’re dancing. You can’t feel unhappy, it’s impossible. It’s such a natural way to release endorphins.

“It’s the way you handle things sometimes that make you feel stronger in yourself. And if you handle them right, you come out feeling good.”


Caroline is currently gearing up for the new series of ‘The X Factor’, which she will be co-hosting with Olly Murs, taking over from departing presenter, Dermot O’Leary, who left the series after eight years in March.

They aren’t the only new additions to the show, though, as new faces Nick Grimshaw and Rita Ora will be replacing Louis Walsh and Mel B on the judging panel, alongside returning judges Cheryl Fernandez-Versini and Simon Cowell.



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Miley Cyrus Opens Up About Body Image Issues And Anxiety: ‘I Was Made To Look Like Someone That I Wasn't'

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Miley Cyrus has given a revealing interview, in which she opens up about her body image issues.

The star has come a long way since her days as a Disney kid, and during a chat with Marie Claire, Miley explains the pressure she felt to look a certain way, while working for the company.

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Miley Cyrus


"From the time I was 11, it was, 'You're a pop star! That means you have to be blonde, and you have to have long hair, and you have to put on some glittery tight thing,'" she says. "Meanwhile, I'm this fragile little girl playing a 16-year-old in a wig and a ton of makeup. It was like ‘Toddlers & Tiaras’."

Miley’s big break at Disney came with ‘Hannah Montana’, in which she played Miley Stewart, a girl who was a regular teen by day, and superstar pop singer by night.

The ‘Bangerz’ creator goes on to reveal how she felt when the show ended in 2011, stating: "I was made to look like someone that I wasn't, which probably caused some body dysmorphia because I had been made pretty every day for so long, and then when I wasn't on that show, it was like, Who the f**k am I?"

"I would have anxiety attacks. I'd get hot flashes, feel like I was about to pass up or throw up. It would happen a lot before shows, and I'd have to cancel. Then the anxiety started coming from anxiety.

"You get in this hole that seems like you're never going to be able to get out of."


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Miley is Marie Claire's September cover star


Nowadays, when she’s not in the studio, Miley also works with the Happy Hippie Foundation, a charity she set up to help youth homelessness, and she's previously opened up on the topic, revealing that she considers herself the perfect person to highlight the issue.

“I’m the one that can fix it,” she said. “I think I’ve been able to identify with it just because I’ve never thought of myself as, ‘I’m a girl and so I can’t do this, or I can do this, or you’ve got to be a boy to do that.’ I feel completely like I’m not tied to a gender or to an age. I feel like an infinite cosmic thing, and that’s what I want people to feel.”

Later this month, she’ll be back at the MTV VMAs, and this time around she’ll be in the driving seat.



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Cliff Richard Thanks Loyal Fans For Support, With Tour And New Song 'Golden' For 75th Birthday

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It's been a tumultuous year for Sir Cliff Richard, but he's putting his troubles to one side, to come out singing for his 75th birthday in October, with a tour AND a brand new song.

The veteran singer has been knocked sideways both by investigations into alleged historic sexual offences, and by the recent death of his close friend Cilla Black.

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Still singing - Cliff Richard at 75


However, his new song 'Golden' is a tribute to his staunch army of fans for the support they've shown during his six-decade career, which has not swayed in any way during the past couple of years, despite his tucking himself away at his holiday home, saying it was too painful for him to return to the UK in the light of the police investigations.

Written by long standing writer friend Chris Eaton – who also wrote ‘Saviour’s Day’ - it was originally penned in time to mark his 50 years in the music business in 2008. Cliff performed it in his concerts that year - but it has only now been recorded.

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Cliff is still grief-stricken following the death of his great friend Cilla Black


There is also a new compilation to come - triple-album of hits '75 At 75' - to be released on 18 September, a selection of many of his astonishing 123 hit singles, including 12 number one chart-toppers. He is the only artist (apart from Elvis Presley) to appear in the UK singles charts in every single decade from 1950s to 2000s, and to have had a number one record here in five consecutive decades.

Cliff will also celebrate his landmark birthday with a UK Tour, finishing with six nights at the Royal Albert Hall.

Click here for tour info.



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Book Review: 'Rollaresque, Or the Rakish Progress of the Rolling Stones' by Simon Goddard

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Literally hundreds of books have now been published on the subject of the Rolling Stones and there is little sign of this abating. Is there anything new to say about them? Simon Goddard's new book suggests perhaps not, but his ingenious idea instead, is to come up with a novel way to tell the old stories; literally by reinventing the group's early glory days as a picaresque novel in the style of Thackeray or Fielding.

He brings their rich vocabulary and florid wit to bear on "five of the boldest English rogues as have ever trodden their native soil", arguing that "the lovable rogue begat English literature." Now you may well be thinking, isn't that a rather flimsy hook to hang a book upon. This was certainly my feeling as I struggled through the turgid opening chapters.

My heart felt heavy when I noticed the author had even included a glossary to help we "sour wretches, raised without nourishment of art or poetry," bringing back dismal school day memories of Chaucer which could not simply be read and enjoyed without first translating it. The eight illustrations with their antiquated style, a tribute to Hogath's Rake's Progress just struck me as pretentious and the clever-clever language often felt like a tiresome hurdle requiring considerable effort to reach the content.

But then, gradually, little by little, I found myself chuckling out loud at some lacerating wit here and reluctantly admiring a bawdy invention there, and I think it was finally around the satirical and, seemingly entirely made up, chapter describing a meeting of the dreaded Jazz Mafia that broke my resistance and won me over. A description of an early Stones audience plucked almost at random gives a sense of the detailed imagination and the absurd and surreal humour at work: "... not a thread of duffel amongst them, their hair unkempt as troglodytes, their number so huge that both sexes splurged together as one in a depraved human chutney of lipstick, knitwear and Chelsea boot".

Underpinning the ornate verbal constructions lies an insightful awareness of the small-minded pettiness, the claustrophobic conformity that stifled England in 1962. The oppressiveness of this short back and sides world is persuasively drawn and helps the reader understand why the Rolling Stones declared war on it and how vilified and loathed they were in return. 'Rollaresque' draws to a close soon after the heroes have been cut down to size by the Establishment in the infamous drug trial of 1967, similar to the moralistic fate dished out in early novels. Except that Goddard plays with the unlikely notion of a Jagger and Richards moral conversion by hinting at what we know to have followed in the years after this incident, the more serious drug issues to come, Brian's death, murder at Altamont etc.

The author may have also have decided to end his book at this point sensing that although the sixties Stones may have fitted the bill of lovable English rogues, the seventies Stones with their tax exile, the jetsetting, the moneygrabbing, the aging, and the model wives might fail to strike a similar chord.

Individually, none of the protagonists are sympathetic characters, with the possible exceptions of Keith Richards and Charlie Watts. Brian Jones comes across as a vile, weak, narcissistic woman-beater and Bill Wyman as a dull, pathetic sex-addicted trainspotter. Strangely Goddard still manages to have you rooting for them collectively despite such defects and some highly questionable behaviour, probably in the same way eighteenth century readers identified with Tom Jones.

If there is such a thing as an average Rolling Stones fan then he (not she) will probably be unhappy with the way the music itself is relegated to the background. He may take umbrage at the limited timespan which ends before the Stones golden period (album-wise) has even begun. If he is not in possession of an English literature A Level he is most likely to be put off by the 'poncey' words and arty gobbledegook: Exactly the aspects I imagine that will excite literary critics or open-minded readers.

Oh, despite being a jaded reader of too many books on the Stones I did learn at least one new fact from this book: Brian had a driving cushion in his Humber to elevate his compromised height and the other Stones regularly hid it to annoy him.

Despite being yet one more Rolling Stones book in a sea of Rolling Stones books, 'Rollaresque' is definitely a one-off.

Published in Hardback by Ebury Press 2015, £20.00

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Boy George Joins 'The Voice' Lineup, Alongside Will.i.am, Paloma Faith And Ricky Wilson

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The BBC may have just pulled a blinder, confirming that Boy George will be replacing Sir Tom Jones in the coaches' lineup for this year's series of 'The Voice'.

Paloma Faith is also confirmed to be taking her place in the big red chair, and previous coaches Will.i.am and Ricky Wilson will both be staying, too.

Boy George may be the secret weapon the BBC needs to put 'The Voice' ahead of 'The X Factor' in the battle for Saturday night ratings.

boy george
Boy George may be the secret weapon the BBC have been hoping for


Both on his own and as the frontman of 80s hitmakers Culture Club, Boy George is one of the world's most distinctive pop personalities, and can claim sales of over 50 million albums and top 10 singles over the last three decades.

Paloma Faith, of whom there had been serious whispers before today's confirmation, is the recent winner of a Brit for Best Female Artist, following her rise to international stardom in 2009. And her three albums have all gone double platinum, so the contestants will, no doubt, be hanging on every word.

Boy George says: “I'm thrilled and excited to be a coach on The Voice UK. I'm a huge fan of the show and have watched and engaged with it from series one. If I can help someone to win I will be delighted. What a wonderful opportunity to share my experiences and help someone move forward with their musical career. I can't wait to sit in that chair!”

Paloma says: “I’m really excited about working with creative people who are there not just to be great singers, but also innovative personalities and performers. I have a long history of helping break artists as in my club nights I booked Kate Nash, Adele, and The Noisettes before they hit the big time & 4 of my band members have gone on to pursue successful solo careers. I’m really looking forward to getting my teeth into something that cultivates the talents of another person and takes the focus off myself for a bit.”

There had been rumours that Will.i.am would be following Rita Ora out of the door, but he's staying put, for now, along with Kaiser Chiefs frontman Ricky Wilson.

Joining the coaches again as show hosts are TV favorites Emma Willis and Marvin Humes.

Moira Ross, The Voice UK Executive Producer, said: “Series 5 looks set to be our liveliest yet, four iconic superstars all with very big personalities. I feel sure we’re on track for another fantastic series.”

The combination of expertise on the coaches' panel will certainly give Simon Cowell something to think about. As well as bagging Rita for this year's panel, he's recruited Radio One host Nick Grimshaw, along with old friend Cheryl Cole.

Let the battles begin...



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Win A Smart TV With 'Absolutely Anything' - In Cinemas 14 August (COMPETITION)

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The hilarious British comedy Absolutely Anything is released in cinemas on August 14th. Simon Pegg and Kate Beckinsale lead the all-star cast, including Robin Williams as the voice of Dennis the dog. To celebrate the release we’re giving you the chance to win a Finlux 42” smart TV so you can watch absolutely anything on apps such as YouTube, Netflix and more!

Click here to be in with the chance of winning this amazing prize!


Absolutely Anything follows a disillusioned school teacher (Pegg) who suddenly finds he has the ability to do anything he wishes, a challenge bestowed upon him by a group of power-crazed aliens (voiced by the Monty Python team), watching him from space. As he struggles to deal with these new found powers and the events that subsequently arise, he calls upon his loyal canine companion Dennis (voiced by Williams) to help him along the way. Mishap after mishap finally leads him to the ultimate conundrum that all men dread and at which many have failed….should he choose the girl….or the dog….?

aa

Watch the trailer here:



To be in with a chance of winning of this incredible prize, simply click here and answer one easy question.

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Frank Turner Album Interview: "I've Literally Never Heard of Drake"

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Frank Turner ducks out of a greying Fitzrovian afternoon into Gibson Guitar Rooms and is coveted like a lost son by the surrounding staff. In many ways it's the perfect habitat for the North-London singer-songwriter. There's no pretension, little glamour - we're a world away from breakfast cereal-themed cafés. It's about the music, man. Not that Turner is a "real" music bore; he just gets on with it and cares little for trends. He first heard of Drake yesterday (thinks he's "OK"), hails Marillion as pioneers and accidentally hired Pink's producer. We sit down.

The new record Positive Songs For Negative People is being pushed on a year-zero ticket. It's surprising to learn that it's the 33 year-old's sixth album (Beyonce's only released five) and - although the fact the songs were knocked out in ten days 'as live' in the studio partly explains it's debut feel - there also seems to be an attempt to draw a line in the sand on what's gone before.

This, then, is Turners second chance to make a first impression and his inspiration comes from both Supergrass ("Their debut is full of piss and vinegar and I love it.") and Tom Waits, "I do think Closing Time was a really interesting record. He was half way through making it, really struggling and thought 'fuck this' invited all his mates down and played the album live in one go with them in the audience. That's an extreme version of what I was doing but I think there's a nod to it."

Some albums end low key (Definitely Maybe) others begin the same way (Is This It?), PSFNP, however, is bookended by two acoustic tracks that belie the positive theme and keep locked away the (at times) relentlessly upbeat and defiant punch-a-longs that come thick and fast at the top of the record, "I still believe in the album as a whole thing," he says "I couldn't put together a running order with those two songs that made sense without using them as bookends, not least Angel Of Islington as it's the introduction piece to the record".

Turner is conversely both a fan of the album as a body of work (though not necessarily vinyl) and the same internet that has gone a long way to eradicating it. The former as a preference to the cherry-picking culture of Spotify, the latter for its removal of the tastemakers you feel he has long despised, "The internet is anti-authoritarian. I'm guessing you're the same age as me right? When we were kids if a label got a certain radio station (I think he means Radio 1) or magazine (I think he means NME) on side they could announce their band was big. And they would be big!"

He points to none other than Marillion as working the "fan club" model way ahead of anyone else and suddenly I remember as a kid hearing them regularly and mysteriously storming Nottingham's local Top 30, thwarting production-line pop with their proggy offerings, the Radiohead of their day, "They've been doing it since the late 80s - ditch your record label and sell to your fanbase. Radiohead are not far away from that but what people leave out is that they had ten years of label marketing budgets".

With his hardcore background and hard-gigging work ethic, Turner is the antithesis of the blog-hyped indie darling and is amusing when rattled, "It was kind of irritating when some arsehole would announce rock music was dead but now it's particularly stupid. Fuck off!" But, I ask, haven't we lost a shared narrative in music today? We're no longer all singing from the same hymn sheet are we? "Culture is much less monolithic for better or worse and I think it's mainly for better. I mean I was with a friend yesterday who told me about somebody called Drake who I'd literally never heard of. My friend was horrified. Apparently this is a huge gigantic omission on my part except of course it fucking isn't. Who gives a shit! My life was happy and fine before and is happy and fine after. It's kind of increasingly ridiculous to go 'Oh my god you haven't heard this..."

For a positive record (in name and mood) that the last two tracks concern death creates an interesting juxtaposition. "I don't make concept records", but Silent Key (the record's penultimate track) is a concept song no? "Yes but its not a concept record. If one chooses this title for an album its tempting to try and shoe horn every song to fit the title, I didn't want to do that." It might also be unbearable to have 12 positive songs on one record also right? "(Laughs) It might well be, it might well be."

The track in question tackles every eighties school kid's 9/11 - The Challenger space shuttle disaster & the plight of teacher Christa McAuliffe, "It's a song I'm quite proud of. It seemed to be such a fascinating idea that a primary school teacher would die in front of the world's school children on international television." Does he remember it at the time? "I have a vanishingly vague memory of it. I can't quite decide how retrospectively beefed up its been. I remember reading about it a few years ago and thinking that's a fascinating thing and next I was in a wiki-hole with 14 different panels open and reading about oil prices in the 1970s or something. Then I discovered she didn't die when the explosion happened but when the craft hit the water, 2:45 later." The length of a song? "Quite."

Aside from news events of the day, the eighties leave their mark elsewhere on the record. The end of Demons feels like its about to go into Full Fathom Five while Josephine sounds like Robert Smith fronting U2, "There were days when I used to want to sit down and try and write Born To Run but recently its just me writing songs. It means you've either settled into finding your own voice or you've disappeared up your own arse and arguably those two things might be the same thing! But I'm definitely a fan of The Cure and U2 and certainly with the artwork for the album there was a Stiff Records vibe." (The latter was created by Matt De Jong and adds to the fresh angle of the record with a neat evocation of 2-Tone-era sleeves and a nod to the live sound of the record in the aesthetic).

Elsewhere The Opening Act Of Spring feels like a hybrid of The Waterboys and current chart kings Years & Years. Have contemporary acts influenced him? "Well I've never really been all that in touch with the charts and I hope that doesn't sound like I'm trying to be too hipster about it. We had to do the Radio 1 Live Lounge a few years ago and I was going through all these Neil Young songs...but Neil Young wasn't in the Top 40."

There's defiance and a desire on the post-intro trio of songs to get out of the house and embrace life. Has depression left its mark on him? "To a degree. An awful lot of this record is a reaction to events on the previous album, which was an attempt to write a break-up record from the point of view of the perpetrator. So there was that and I injured my back really badly touring (two slipped discs in his lower back). I also had my first bit of kicking in the press. I'm not complaining about it too much but there's no real preparation for it. You've been an underground artist for four albums and then suddenly - oh fuck - everybody hates me on Twitter." You're like the guy that killed the lion! "Yeah, well the tidal puritanism of the internet is an extremely negative force and something I had to learn to get over. A big part of the record for me was surviving those things. When down kind of getting back up." It is a very getting back-up type of record, "Well, there you go," he offers.

This may have something to do with producer Butch Walker and his pop pedigree; something Turner was both unaware of and untroubled by when the recording took place in Nashville last year. "The first thing to say is I had no idea Butch Walker was a producer! I've got his solo records and I liked the sound so mentioned him to my label and they said 'Butch Walker as in the guy that produces Pink?!' He's one of the biggest producers in the fucking universe and they said he's way too expensive you can't work with him and that annoyed me so I went on Facebook and sent him an email. The whole Taylor Swift, Katy Perry wasn't at the forefront." Yes, but think of the collaborations?! "Er, I don't think I'm in that universe somehow."

If Walker has perked up Turner's sound, he's not complaining. Returning to our earlier conversation I mention the underrated second Supergrass album but he's not entirely sold. "I agree, but I'd pick I Should Coco. It's more..." Zippier? "Yes Zippier! That's the word. That's the vibe of this record. None of this ponderous six albums in, writing seven-minute epics about the underside of my shoe." And, in a very 2015 way, I leave Turner plotting to hijack the very pop charts he's never listened to.

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Cilla Black Died From Head Injury, Coroner Records Verdict of Accidental Death

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Cilla Black died from a traumatic head injury as a result of a fall, a coroner has ruled.

READ MORE:


A verdict of accidental death was recorded by Andre Rebello during a 15-minute hearing at Liverpool Coroner's Court.

cilla black
Cilla Black


The funeral for the 72-year-old star, who was found dead at her villa in Spain on 1 August, will take place on Thursday (20 August) at St Mary’s Roman Catholic Church in Liverpool.

Addressing the hearing, which was attended by Cilla’s three sons, Mr Rebello referred to the star by her real name Priscilla Maria Veronica Willis.

"She was a daughter of Liverpool and was celebrated and loved by all in Liverpool," he said.

He told sons, Ben, Robert and Jack: "She was your mum and her death is a private personal matter and we have all got one mum.

"It is right that you grieve and remember her."

Following her funeral, the singer will be laid to rest at Allerton Cemetery, where her parents are buried.

Earlier this week, Cilla Black’s spokesman Nick Fiveash urged fans to 'come out and remember her' on the day of her funeral.

He told The Mirror: “It is a Catholic church so it will be a proper mass and service. One would hope people would want to come out and remember her. We will encourage people to do that.”



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Who Reviews The Reviews?

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'You shouldn't read that book,' he cautioned, a tone of urgency in his voice. 'It's got some terrible reviews...'

Earlier, in the bookshop, I'd been excited to find the book on display a few days ahead of its advertised publication date. I had loved the author's previous novel and was looking forward to reading this; the bookseller had shared my excitement.
'Oh yes, he's a great writer, isn't he? Skippy Dies was fantastic.' (I agree that it was one of my very favourite books of a few years ago.) 'And this one has had some marvellous reviews...'

Oh the agony of conflict. It must be three weeks now, and - excited as I was to read it right away - I still haven't. I just seem to be paralysed about picking up a book I've been told I simply must read, and that I simply mustn't read. Every time I've been between books, sometimes even between chapters, I've picked it up, but some sort of brain freeze seems to descend every time.

The same brain freeze has seemed to set in every time I've tried to write, these last few months. That little flashing cursor on a blank document has haunted me, mingling the desire to write with the fear of what people might say... if anything at all! Somehow I've never been so aware of the silent cacophony of endless commentary, from the pages of newspapers or magazines to the threads of social media. Perhaps being on holiday has simply given me time to look. In Twelfth Night, Shakespeare has the Sea Captain explain to Viola that: 'What great ones do the less will prattle of.' It seems to me that the prattle isn't limited to the activities of the 'great ones'. Sure, everyone is talking about the secret wedding of Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux, or whether Jeremy Corbyn will be the next Labour Party Leader, or that David Cameron's been wearing FitFlop shoes on holiday. But the prattlers seem to descend at top speed on us all. A couple of weeks ago, bleary-eyed with summer flu, I unthinkingly 'shared' a Facebook post about an unusual calendar arrangement this August, which might bring luck. Had I been more awake, yes, I'd probably (a) not have shared something so inane and (b) have noticed that it contained an error. In a move which led to untold online flagellation, however, I committed the Cardinal Sin of the C21st: I Was Wrong On The Internet. Oh the shame. Within seconds, comments were added, some of them by people I didn't even know, saying things like 'This is WRONG!' or 'Ha ha, what an idiot!' I deleted my faux-pas and am learning to live with the shame...

But it's more serious than that. In a recent series of curated press cuttings passed on for my further edification, I've learned, among other things, that smartphones are ruining the world, that celebrity actors ruin plays, that London, as a city of villages, is rapidly being destroyed by the homogeneity of multi-national chains (quite probably true, this one, but the tone of the article irritated me) - and that only the academically mediocre go into teaching, therefore there are very, very few good teachers, therefore examination results go down because the young people of today are glued to those life-destroying smartphones and the teachers are a bit inept, while increasingly liberal systems have robbed them of the discipline they need. Oh: did I mention, I'm a teacher....?

What everyone does, everyone else doth prattle of. And that's fine: we should all maintain the right to prattle freely. But the prattling cacophony which has deafened me this summer has left me lost for words. I've read a lot: I've read what I've felt like reading, ignoring or often not even reading the reviews. I read Go Set A Watchman (I suspect this was obligatory for everyone who teaches English) despite the cautions and the frowns. I've read light-hearted trash; I've read serious literature. I've read books which kept me awake at night and books which made me fall asleep; serious newspapers, trashy magazines, blogs, tweets, serious textbooks about education...

Reviewing my reading, you could accuse me of being undiscriminating. I should be sticking to the Man Booker Longlist, perhaps: to 'literature'. Nonsense. I read compulsively. I read because if I didn't read, I would go mad. I read regardless, sometimes in defiance of, the reviews. And somehow, I simply have to write as well. I'll never write anything worth reviewing. Perhaps it's the ultimate irony, feeling silenced by the tide of commenting, to add my own prattle to the din. But somehow I have to: somehow it's like the Northern Irish summer which came for one day, just yesterday, when simply everyone went to the beach and I'd have felt left out if I hadn't gone there too, just for an hour. Perhaps I simply need to have a word.

'Now,' as Elizabeth Bennet might have challenged Mr Darcy, had she been a blogger, 'review me if you dare.'

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An Open Letter to Reformed Spinster Jennifer Aniston

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Dear Jen,

Congratulations! We're all so pleased for you. Finally, you can be happy. Wonderful and gallant Thingymebob has taken up the mantle of putting a ring on it. ('It' is you, by the way, you are 'it'.) Lovely Thingymebob, he finally succumbed to all the pressure and begrudgingly agreed to marry a beautiful Hollywood star. You've worn him down and now you're MRS Thingymebob! I'm sure he knew you in the beforetime, and pined after Rachel From Friends because you were so beautiful and you had the best hair there's ever been. That was before he actually started dating you though, and as soon as you started dating, for reasons we've all assumed even though it makes no sense, he didn't want to settle down. This must have been the case because he is male and you are female and you are so old and sad and desperate. Thingymebob, on the other hand, needed to be 'tamed'. You tamed him! Yay!

You were so sad before, weren't you? I wonder if you lunged for every bouquet ever chucked. It's the bouquet catches that sting the most, I know. You had too much prosecco and it seemed so LOLZ. Maybe you used underhand tactics for some of them, just to get your hands on that bouquet. Maybe you winded somebody in the fray. Figures. It's just so you don't have to be so passive, I know. It's just so women in toilets don't take your hand and look you in the eye and say: "it will happen for you, Jen. Thingymebob will do it soon, despite how gross you are." They were right, those women in toilets, weren't they? What did we tell you?! You clung onto Thingymebob with a tight grip, always had your maniacal eyes on the prize. You seemed happy with your millions of dollars and your combined beauty and your being in love, but you weren't happy, were you? You needed The Ring. Us gals are basically demented Gollums, deep down.

You're so lucky Jen, Thingymebob really is a keeper. I mean he's given up his bachelorhood! Ask any man, their single lives are mostly spent on yachts or in the Playboy mansion, surrounded by a warren of playmates. Unlike you, Thingymebob didn't have the blinkered pursuit of marriage. We're just different, us girls, we lose our minds over cupcakes and centrepieces. We don't fear commitment or mourn our tragic single lives. The most important thing is that someone marries you, so really any man would do. Even Celebrity Love Rat John Mayer™ would've done, a man who describes his penis as a 'white supremacist', and women as 'sexual napalm'. But you weren't sexual napalm, were you Jen? You weren't good enough to tame Celebrity Love Rat John Mayer™.

But now you have Thingymebob! Keep hold of this one. Men just become so distinguished as they age, and you're not getting any younger... We all really hope you'll have a baby soon, and then you'll be content. I'm sure that's all you've ever wanted, just to finally be a complete person.

With best wishes,
Clare xx

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Tom Jones Lashes Out At The BBC Over ‘The Voice' Sacking: ‘This Is Sub-Standard Behaviour From Executives'

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Tom Jones has made a strongly worded statement, following the announcement that he won’t be returning to the ‘The Voice UK’ for the next series.

On Friday, it was announced that Boy George and Paloma Faith will be joining the judging panel, and working alongside returning coaches Ricky Wilson and Will.i.am.

tom jones
Tom Jones


Tom has now revealed that he’s not happy with the way the BBC have dealt with things, stating that he was only notified about the changes to the show 24 hours before the official announcement was made.

In a post on his Facebook page, Tom writes: “In good faith, as part of the team, I’d put the time in my schedule to be involved in Series 5, as I’ve done so for the last 4 years.

“I’ve supported the show and the BBC since the beginning. I was told yesterday, with no consultation or conversation of any kind, that I would not be returning.”

“This sub-standard behaviour from the executives is very disappointing,” he adds.

Read his full post below:

About The Voice UK: In good faith, as part of the team, I’d put the time in my schedule to be involved in Series 5, as...

Posted by Tom Jones on Friday, 14 August 2015



The BBC have responded to Tom’s post, stating:
“The final decision on the coaches line up for series five of ‘The Voice’ was only taken on Wednesday and Tom's team was informed early yesterday morning.

"We then announced it to the press so that it didn't leak. This has been the same every year and no role was ever promised.

"The chemistry between the coaches is extremely important and that they all represent different musical genres and we feel the new line up is exactly what the show needs. We look forward to seeing Tom on BBC One in October with his Children in Need concert.

"Tom hasn't been axed or fired from ‘The Voice’. He was out of contract once series four ended in April and that contract has not been renewed."

The changes come following the departure of Rita Ora, who left the show for ‘X Factor’ after just one series.

Boy George and Paloma have shared their excitement ahead of the new series, which will return to our TV screens this autumn.



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Sharon Stone Poses Naked For Harper's Bazaar Magazine (PICS)

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Sharon Stone has stripped off for Harper’s Bazaar magazine, and appears naked in the mag’s September issue.

In the stunning shots, Sharon is wearing nothing but a simple necklace and stilettos, and the star looks nothing short of totally fabulous.

sharon stone
Amazing.


The ‘Basic Instinct’ star has also opened up about what it’s like doing a naked photoshoot, saying: “I’m aware that my ass looks like a bag of flapjacks but I’m not trying to be the best-looking broad in the world.

“At a certain point you start asking yourself, ‘What really is sexy?’ It’s not just the elevation of your boobs. It’s being present and having fun and liking yourself enough to like the person that’s with you.

“If I believed that sexy was trying to be who I was when I did Basic Instinct, then we’d all be having a hard day today.”


sharon stone
Sharon Stone


Sharon also opens up about the stroke she suffered in 2013, explaining how her life has changed since.

“It took two years for my body just to absorb all the internal bleeding I had. It almost feels like my entire DNA changed,” she states. “ My brain isn’t sitting where it used to, my body type changed, and even my food allergies are different. I became more emotionally intelligent.

“I chose to work very hard to open up other parts of my mind. Now I’m stronger. And I can be abrasively direct. That scares people, but I think that’s not my problem. It’s like, I have brain damage; you’ll just have to deal with it.”

This isn’t the first time Sharon has starred in a racy shoot, and just last year, she posed for GQ magazine.

Read Sharon’s full interview, and see more pictures, in September’s Harper’s Bazaar.



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